Why did the Pilgrims create Thanks giving day?
They wanted another excuse to watch football.
Waxing eloquent on the sins of the flesh, the dynamic young preacher raised himself to full height, leaned over the pulpit and boomed,
“Brothers and sisters, if there are any among you who have committed adultery, may your tongue cleave to the woof of your mouf!”
Jewish view on when life begins: There’s a big controversy on when life begins. In Jewish tradition the fetus is not considered viable until after it graduates from medical school.
A man walks up to a woman in his office and tells her that her hair smells nice. The woman immediately goes into her supervisor’s office and tells him that she wants to file a sexual harassment suit and explains why. The supervisor is puzzled by this time and says, “What’s wrong with the coworker telling you your hair smells nice?”
The woman replies, “He’s a midget.”
What do you get if you sleep under a cow?
A PAT on the head.
Chuck Norris does not know about this website. If he did he would have just deleted the internet.
Saddam Hussein was not found hiding in a “hole.” Saddam was roundhouse-kicked in the head by Chuck Norris in Kansas, which sent him through the earth, stopping just short of the surface of Iraq.
Nagasaki never had a bomb dropped on it. Chuck Norris jumped out of a plane and punched the ground.
When Chuck Norris was denied an Egg McMuffin at McDonald’s because it was 10:35, he roundhouse kicked the store so hard it became a Wendy’s.
Chuck Norris once bench-pressed the entire state of Ohio, and all of its residents.